Dissertation Dathun - Day 9 - Returning to the object


Last night, I stayed up too late.  I watched 3 episodes of Westworld, which weren’t particularly fulfilling.  But I stayed up too late anyway.  If my schedule is like my posture in sitting meditation, how does my response to recognizing that I’ve lost my posture inform what I do now that I’ve noticed that I’ve slipped in my schedule?  Altogether, I’m not really sure what I’m doing anymore.  I do know that I don’t feel connected to any sense of simplicity.  Or really clarity about my object.  
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As I write this though, I look up at the title.  Dissertation Dathun.  This is dissertation dathun.  I’m working with my dissertation and my habits around it.  I find some aspects of my environment supportive and others not.  But simplicity.  I think simplicity has to do with my own allegiance.  There are circumstances that I cannot simplify, like needing to go to physical therapy and get rides there and back, and figuring out how to start going back to the lab.  Deciding when I’m going to try that.  Then there are circumstances that I can simplify.  Not fretting about what it is the best dharma to study in support of this particular practice of dissertation dathun.  Renouncing further discursiveness.  There are parts of the poetry project to participate in.  But not the research side.  Not trying to follow every little lineage lead.  My bandwidth for that is for dissertation.  I’m developing familiarity with my dissertation and with my mind amidst doing it.  

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